Here are a couple unbelievable facts. In fact, they're so unbelievable, you might not even believe them. First up: it's December. Yes, it really, really is December. Second, and somewhat related, NaNoWriMo is officially behind us.

A week ago I called myself a winner, but strictly speaking, this isn't true. Why? Well, I'm glad you asked. The idea behind NaNoWriMo is to start (and finish!) a minimum 50,000 word novel in a single month. I disqualified myself from the very beginning since I started on November 2nd with 30,450 words already under my belt.

It had taken me three months to write thirty thousand words. (Or sixteen years, depending on when you start counting.) So the thought of actually writing fifty thousand in a single thirty-day period was beyond my comprehension. So I had two goals: 1) a very lofty goal of adding 50k words to the existing manuscript; or 2) add 20k words to bring the grand total to 50k.

Check this out:

In case you don't know what that is, that's my NaNoWriMo graph. The goal was to write at least 50,000 words in thirty days and I somehow managed to do it with a week to spare. And that included a four day trip out of town and a full day today laying some wood laminate flooring. Oh yeah, and never mind the day job.

So because of all that, I'm seriously tired right now and heading to bed. I'll fill you in on all the details first Tuesday in December, as promised.

Oh, and if you're wondering, no, I'm not done. Not even close. But more on that later.

Time for a quiz, kids! Complete the following sentence: "NaNoWriMo is . . ."

a) 1667 words a day?
b) voluntary torture?
c) giving yourself permission to write complete trash?
d) all of the above?

If you selected "d" then you're absolutely correct. The full definition of NaNoWriMo can be found in this image from a recent Austin lock-in.

I realize I haven't given you all very much personal progress on the nano front, but I think today's efforts are worthy of an off-day post. (Deb, consider today Thunday.)

So what was so special about today's progress? I'm glad you asked! There are several things:

1. My manuscript's word count today ended up at exactly 65,536 words. For you non-nerds out there, this is exactly 2¹⁶. Cool, huh? (For those of you keeping score at home, my official nano word count is actually 35,086 words. This is because I cheated and began the month with a 30,450 word manuscript. Shhh. Don't tell anyone.)
2. The total word count just now surpassed the word count of my last book by 102 words. So it's official. My novel will be a lot longer than the diet book.
3. It finally dawned on me that if you actually work on something, you can make progress on it. Imagine that.

Hey, and if you're all lucky, I may just tell you what it's about at some point. (And if I'm lucky, you'll actually care.)

As everyone knows, there are two kinds of people in the world: those that divide the world into two kinds of people and those that don't. I used to place myself in the former category, but now I find myself in the uncomfortable position of having to alter long-held beliefs. There are actually three kinds of people in the world: those who've never heard of NaNoWriMo, those who have heard of it and have actually entered, and those who've heard of it and say they're going to enter year after year after year, yet haven't ever done it because they've constantly been busy at work or busy with other writing projects or busy working on his stupid blog.

Disclaimer: technically, that's not three kinds of people. That's two kinds of people where one of the two kinds was further subdivided into two kinds of people. I need to ponder this some more.

For the uninitiated, NaNoWriMo is short for "Naturally Nomadic Writhing Monsters" . . . Wait a minute. That doesn't sound right. Hang on.